Personal Development

Jay Shetty: Why Small Talk Should Be Banned & 9 Questions That Go Deeper

Every day I usually listen to a podcast or two while I work at my 9-5. I’ve been trying to play catch up on a lot of my podcasts that are still in my queue while also staying up to date on my regulars. I noticed that I had missed a few episodes of On Purpose with Jay Shetty and as I scrolled through some of the topics of the episodes I stumbled on the episode that was titled “Why Small Talk Should Be Banned & 9 Questions That Go Deeper” and honestly it changed my whole perspective on having conversations.

In the past few months, I’ve really been diving into meditating and studying chakras and chakra healing. It all stemmed from my manifestation journey that I started earlier this year.

In my studies I’ve discovered that my chakras are pretty weak, but I think that my weakest chakra is my throat chakra.

This is important because the throat chakra is the voice of the body and it is the pressure valve that allows the energy from the other chakras to be expressed.

If your throat chakra is out of balance you may experience physical and spiritual symptoms such as sore throats, stiff necks, headaches, loss of words, habitually lying, and so many more.

I noticed that I had a lot of those symptoms and it really effected my every day life. I still struggle with speaking the right words. I get stiff necks from time to time and it all makes sense now.

Anyways, I digress.

On Purpose with Jay Shetty

Jay Shetty’s podcast really grabbed my attention. In the podcast he spoke about his experience going to a foundation event where the invited guests were not allowed to have small talk. After the event was over, the guests were impressed with how many true and honest connections they made from this one experience. Some even exchanging numbers to hopefully meet up again.

On Purpose with Jay Shetty Podcast screenshot

I was hooked and wanted to learn the secrets to having these magical conversations because I am literal shit when it comes to having a conversation. I struggle with things to come up with and just stand there awkwardly until the next thing pops into my brain to say. Anyone else relate?

Please tell me I’m not alone!

5 questions you need to remove right now

I am so glad that I pressed play because Jay Shetty gives us the 5 questions that you need to remove right now! Yes, that literally means you are NOT allowed to say them AT ALL. And they are:

  1. What do you do?
  2. Where do you live?
  3. How has the weather been?
  4. How was your journey here?

These questions are so freaking boring!! I am 1000000000000000% guilty of having these awful conversations that ultimately lead to a long pause before the next painful question comes. Thankfully, Jay Shetty is about to come and save us from ourselves.

9 questions that go deeper

The next part is what we’re all really waiting for: the questions you DO want to ask.

  1. What was the last lie you told? Would you do it again?
  2. If your younger self met you today, what would make them happy and what would make them sad about you?
  3. What situations make you feel awkward and why?
  4. What did you buy recently that you now regret?
  5. Have you ever been to jail, been arrested, or gotten away with something of the like?
  6. What do you think makes a person most attractive? How attractive are you on that scale?
  7. Complete this sentence. If you really know me you would know that [blank].
  8. What do you fight about most in your romantic relationships?
  9. What would you talk about the most in a one hour therapy session?
Man slow clapping
These just bring a tear to my eye

Practicing what Jay Shetty taught us

Ladies and gentlemen, can you believe that just by exchanging a few of those old, boring questions with these new, more intuitive and vulnerable questions will literally change an entire conversation and actually creating a dialogue?

Just imagine, you go to your next networking event and you casually drop one of these questions on someone you just met. What if you and that person fall in love???? Or what if you and that person become bff’s?????? What if you and that person create the next multi million dollar company just because you decided to actually engage in a deep vulnerable conversation with a total stranger.

I have a feeling that when I use these questions at my next opportunity that I will be able to open up my throat chakra more and be honest with my true authentic self.

One of the major things to remember is to answer these questions first for yourself before you ask them to other people.

You are able to truly understand what you need to do to get a genuine answer from someone and be able to stay in that place when you do ask it of someone else. The more you share; you learn more. The more they share; you learn more.

I vow to stop having small talk and start having authentic and true conversations with people. I hope to dive more into chakras and chakra healing next year and will keep you all updated in how my chakra alignment process comes along.

Make sure y’all vote in The Ultimate Christmas Movie Bracket! There are only a few days left until it’s all over!

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